Advice: How to cope when bad things happen


It’s not always easy staying positive when there are many sad things happening around us and sometimes to us.

Staying happy is a full-time job when you’re an adult. The days when your only worry was making weekend plans with your friends are long gone.

The most difficult thing in life is trying to understand why bad things happen. We lost our nephew Josh in 2005 when the truck his best friend was driving flipped over. He was 19 years old and a great kid, loved by all with a bright future ahead of him.

Josh and his best friend were on their way to talk to a rancher about hunting on his land — two friends driving down a country road enjoying their day.

But bad things happen and, when they do, it shakes us up. It makes us realize how determined we are sometimes to make a mess of life and complain about things that are not important.

Illnesses and senseless accidents that are difficult to comprehend will affect all of us in some way.

When bad things happen, all we can do is wake up every morning and allow God’s love to guide us.

Over the years, I have found myself repeating, “Let go, let God.” This mantra has helped me release negative thoughts and deal with difficult circumstances.

Overcoming loss is the most difficult thing in life. Harold Kushner wrote “In All You Ever Wanted Isn’t Enough,” “We can endure much more than we think we can; all human experience testifies to that. All we need to do is learn not to be afraid of pain. Grit your teeth and let it hurt. Don’t deny it; don’t be overwhelmed by it. It will not last forever. One day, the pain will be gone and you will still be there.”

And on that day, you must honor the memory of the person you lost by living life to the fullest. By giving thanks and asking God for courage to live in this less-than-perfect world.

Maria Luisa Salcines is a freelance writer and certified parent educator with The International Network for Children and Families in Redirecting Children’s Behavior and Redirecting for a Cooperative Classroom. Follow her on Twitter @PowerOfFamily, or on Instagram @mlsalcines. You can also contact her on her blog FamilylifeandFinding